I had prepared for my trip a year in advance by fundraising, packing, gathering aid and praying. I knew it would be an emotional experience when I was there, and that I would shed some tears. One thing I didn’t prepare for was the emotional journey once I returned home.

As my plane hit the tarmac back in the United States, I started to cry. Eleven days earlier I had traveled to Romania with six others to serve with Buckner.

We served orphaned, abandoned and at-risk children in several facilities. It was my first international mission trip and journey outside of the U.S.

When I arrived at my apartment I started to weep.  Suddenly the experiences of the week set in and emotions surfaced. In Romania I cried a couple of times and was emotional, but it didn’t compare to the heartache I felt now. I cried if I talked about the trip to anyone.  I remember writing my trip leader and asking if this was normal.

God broke my heart in Romania. He broke it for their needs, their lives and their future. I didn’t cry for the material things they didn’t have, but the love and care that was missing.

My heart broke for the little boy who has never heard I love you, the little girl who is sick with no care, the teen who is thinking about where their next meal will come from, and the adult who has never been told God loves you.

I was broken for God’s children across the globe. I didn’t know how to live my typical day to day after seeing the needs.  So I turned to God and experienced the beauty of being broken. I let the emotions flow and began journaling, praying, and reading the Bible to grow and have strength.

I cherish that time of brokenness and am thankful I experienced it. Perhaps that was just a taste of how God’s heart breaks for his children.

Jess Wolterstorff is a pediatric therapist from St. Paul, Minn. She traveled to Romania in October 2010 and hopes to continue doing short term missions serving children and orphans around the world.

Prayer Requests:
- God, show us how to have compassion for those we encounter.
- God, help us to serve you completely.

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If you are interested in submitting a devotional for Buckner Faith Focus, please e-mail lhollon@buckner.org.

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